The Biological Imperative to Idiocy

There's been a lot of adultery in the news lately. This has, in turn, led to a lot of discussion about the reasons why, the pathologies of powerful men, etc., etc. And this morning the Today Show had the inevitable segment on why adultery is a biological imperative and monogamy is actually the unnatural state. I have some things to say about that.

First, say we accept the argument that evolution has programmed us this way, that it makes absolute sense from that standpoint to spread seed around like we still need to populate the earth. If that is your belief, I think that actually points to some obvious flaws in the argument.

First, aren't we supposed to be the most highly evolved critter around? Haven't we developed things that set us apart from other creatures--things like moral code, table manners, the ability to judge right and wrong? So can we not then say that those who give into these "inevitable" evolutionary urges are by definition less fully evolved? Good on you, Cro-Mag guy, way to sleep around!

Secondly, since when has something in our evolutionary past justified our more evolved present? Do we still drag our knuckles on the ground? No, because it's no longer necessary. We no longer have gills or feathers or whatever the latest family tree says is in our past. We don't have them because we don't need them. Can you imagine someone getting caught "gilling" and using the excuse, "I can't help it, honey! It's a biological imperative--millions of years of evolution have gone into my need to do this!" "But we don't live underwater anymore! That's just idiotic!"

Say men are programmed to look for the best partner of the moment, whether that's their chosen partner or not. (And leaving aside, for the moment, the fact that more women than ever are also cheating). How much of an excuse can that really be? I've just never understood the inability to admit, "Yeah, I looked and lusted in a split second before I realized it, but after that initial unconcious slip that I can be excused for, I made a lot of conscious choices that led me to actually have sex with this person." It's not like adultery doesn't usually take some planning. You don't see a woman at the bank or at your child's school and accidently boink her as you walk by. You still have to woo or be wooed, however abbreviated the process might be. You are culpable for every one of those decisions along that continuum. Biology can answer why you notice or appreciate, but past that, biology's just allowing you to get it up; it's not calling the hooker or booking the motel.